Day 162 – To do the thing you don’t want to (but really do!)

As I lay here, completely satisfied with the day I had; utterly worn out, spent, and fulfilled, I recall the particular moments that led to the series of events that made up the day.  Interestingly, it was not the events themselves that made this day satisfying, or even the decisions that I made.  It was the theme that cut across those decisions, that lay under them. 

The theme of coming out of your shell.  And staying out there.

I’m thinking of just how I would feel if, during the multiple opportunities I had to continue to try new things and challenged myself with new and unknown experiences, I would have turned it all down.  I would probably be sitting as I am now, in the room I am staying at in my Australian Aunt’s house, looking at a screen.  I would probably be feeling pretty isolated and glum, having spent so long in a small room with nothing to keep me company but Youtube videos, with a whole world alive and living out there.  And me in here.  I would probably be ruminating in a useless way about this whole vacation and my enjoyment of it.

Blissfully, this is not the case.

Despite my fatigue, emotionally and physically; despite my feelings of being judged and feeling insecure in new and strange surroundings; I decided to stay out of my shell.  I lifted weights with complete strangers, my accent betraying my foreigner’s origin.  I played a round of golf as a complete novice immediately after, quickly amalgamating a new skillset amidst a team of pros.  Then, I decided to not stay in and instead go out for a Monday night movie with everyone.

And now, having felt like I chose the right path of how to navigate the day, fighting against the Denying Force and building positive momentum, I can relax with peace of mind. 

 

 

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